Hi, there! Would you like some peen cuisine? You know, it’s that sort of food with a very “handy” style, that you can almost hold into your hand and savour it like a heavenly honey.
Alright, now coming back to Earth after being a little shocked, we present you the perfect food for the perfect bachelorette party. Forget the dick-shaped ice cubes, you gotta’ have this penis-shaped meals to party like a real bachelorette.
Yes, they are real and the author of these art pieces is Peen Cuisine, a food blog that has just launched this Wednesday. Behind this blog, we find a 27 year-old, named Lauren Hom. In her own words, she “wanted to make penis-shaped versions of food that you’d actually want to eat on the regular, like pear and gorgonzola pizza and miso-butter roasted corn”. She is a vegetarian and likes to joke that she owns a “meat-free meat blog”. She doesn’t spend too much time on cooking her recipes because, as she says, “people should be able to enjoy dicks everyday, not just at bachelorette parties”.
Now, you got a whole list of pictures showing her art pieces in their full splendour. We gotta’ say, they look quite delicious, even for someone who is not a big fan of vegetarian food. And they might be vegetarian on the inside, but very not-so-vegetarian on the outside.
Hom is a full-time illustrator and the idea for Peen Cuisine came to her a year ago. She was having a drink with friends and they were debating why talking about penises make people laugh. “I wondered if cave men used to see dick-shaped rocks and chuckle to themselves, or if this was something relatively new. All of a sudden, a light bulb went off in my brain: dick-shaped foods would be funny”, says Lauren Hom.
The name peen cuisine is another idea that was born an unexpected happening. She posted a photo on Instagram with the caption “foods before dudes” and someone commented “cuisine before been”. “I think I spit out my drink when I read it, because it was so damn clever and I made a mental note of it,” Hom said. More info: peencuisine.com
So, voilà, Peen Cuisine!
Pear & Gorgonzola Peenza
Cockamole & Chips
Laura Hom in the flesh
Green Peen Ricotta Dip
Dark Chocolate Cock Pops
Just dip it in there…
Blueberry Cream Puffs
Fried Tofu with Peen-Nut Sauce
The mold she used for her Peen Cuisine
Nice looking cookies
All images: LAUREN HOM