38 Whiskey River Soaps For Any Occasion Or Person

Whiskey River Soaps make you smell like all of your bad decisions. It’s the next best thing to bathing in a pool of liquor. I’m not sure why anyone would want to go around smelling like whatever they were drinking last night. At least now even if you didn’t actually shower you can blame it on this awesome new soap.

But they don’t just do soaps for drunkies, they have a ton of options to choose from. For example, they have one called Soap to Help Prevent Selfies. I’d use that every day if it would keep people around me from taking dumb selfies.

According to thefunkybubble.com Whiskey River Soaps was founded ” more than fourteen million years ago in the outskirts of Ancient Rome by a ragtag group of freelance gladiators, stray dogs and out-of-work magicians.” They had me at ‘stray dogs.’

Leave your thoughts in the comments section. I’d love to know which one of these soaps is most popular.

1: Whiskey River Soaps for boozers – smells like your breath

2: Soap for stoners – smells like Colorado

3: Soap for the slightly unhinged – smells like unpredictable behavior

4: Soap for karma – Smells like HaHaHA

5: Soap for morning people – smells like a hell no

6: Soap for the middle child – smells like nothing basically

7: Soap for no regrets – smells like a bad tattoo

8: Soap for hoarders – smells like garbage & goo

9: Soap for dead end jobs – smells like a polyester uniform

10: Soap for pity parties – smells like scented with country music

11: Soap for #blessed people – smells like extra specialness

12: Soap for Queens – smells like major drama

13: Soap for it’s only frickin Tuesday – smells like slowly dying

14: Soap for Okay moms – smells like truth

15: Soap for under achievers – smells like mediocrity

16: Soap for frenemies – smells like backhanded compliments

17: Soap for stalkers – smells like the willies

18: Soap for awkward moments – smells like your entire life

19: Soap for introverts – smells like nothing

20: Soap for debbie downers – smells like rampant pessimism

21: Soap for gray areas – smells like ambiguity

22: Soap for white guys – smells like old money & nostalgia

23: Soap for selfies – smells like eye-rolling & general derision

24: Soap for a man’s man – smells like Alaska

25: Soap for geeks – smells like Wifi

26: Soap for emojis – smells like the decline of an entire species

27: Soap for in-law dinners – smells like you’ll never be good enough

28: Soap for yuge mistakes – smells like a come-over

 

29: Soap for upcycled garbage – smells like an etsy store

30: Soap for smug people – smells like an 8-dollar coffee

31: Soap for weird teachers – smells like odd mannerisms and orange corduroy

32: Soap for wedded bliss – smells like two, three years tops

33: Soap for online dating – smells like a 10-year-old picture

34: Soap for OCD – smells like obsessive behavior

35: Soap for office gossip – smells like a scandal

36: Soap for creepy uncles – smells like fresh moustache scent

37: Soap for formally employed – smells like day time & tv and beer

38: Whiskey River Soaps for the neighbors – smells like a wide berth

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